Book Review: It's (not that) Complicated

It’s (not that) Complicated

This may be one of the most difficult times to live in in terms of boy/girl relationships. That’s why It’s (not that) Complicated comes at such an opportune time for young ladies. In this book, Anna Sophia and Elizabeth Botkin explore many different angles of young ladies relationships, focusing in on their relationships with guys. They answer many common questions regarding these relationships, and base their well-versed teachings on scripture. The ideas that they present to young ladies are made in a very coherent and easy-to-learn manner.

I loved this book- I thought it was a lot better than the girls’ first book, So Much More, which I felt was gave more of a message to the effect of “this is the right way- do this, this and this”. I didn’t dislike So Much More, I just didn’t like it as much as this book. It’s (not that) Complicated gives more general guidelines and scripture verses and lets the reader decide how to apply them based on the individual.

Reading this book definitely got me very motivated to improve my relationships, not just with guys, but with everyone. On the other hand, if you are already depressed or thinking of your Total Depravity, this book will not improve your self-image. Anna and Elizabeth have a lot to say to young ladies, and a lot of it is very convicting and right-on.

I couldn’t really say that I had a particular part that I enjoyed, or something that was especially convicting. However, I did like what they had to say about your relationships with your brothers- when they open the chapter with “Now, some of you might be thinking...”, I must admit that they caught me redhanded. It also hit me when they said that you need to improve your family relationships because your husband is going to be your family. As much as you would like to think that your relationship with him will be all happy-go-lucky, it won’t. Now you may think that I’m crazy, but I never really thought about it like that before. A lot of us girls are more than willing to “skip” the family relationships, and work on other relationships. We have to ask ourselves, why? Is it maybe because our family will never stop loving us, while others could? Or is it maybe because your friend relationships are more “fun”? Or, how about, because your family relationships bring out the worst in you? Anna and Elizabeth say that who you are at your worst is who you really are. This taught me that just because I’m my “best” around others, that doesn’t mean that that’s who I am. The true “me”, the one that I need to work on, is what comes out when I am with those closest to me. I realized the truth in the fact that the people that it is sometimes that most difficult to be with are the ones who most sanctify you.

I find that this book is applicable to everyday life, which is something that I always enjoy; because so much of what they say is about the struggles of the heart, something that we deal with every day. It is really just a choice that we make every day to do the right thing, day after day, situation after situation. Also, I did enjoy that this was an easy read. I think that I finished it in about two weeks. It also does not take an advanced reader to be able to comprehend their message.

Something that I disliked was that the authors never really said that they had struggled with these things. They were not rude, but sometimes (not all of the time) it came across as “We don’t really struggle with this”.

Would I recommend It’s (not that) Complicated? Definitely. This is probably a book that I will revisit sometime in the future. After reading this book, I felt that all was not hopeless, and felt that I could work at improving my relationships with guys. It will always be a struggle, but I feel confident that, with God’s help, I will be victorious. This is my parting advice: if you are a young lady, actually any lady- read this book. You will benefit from it, even if you think that “You’ve got it all down”.

(I apologize if my thoughts are a bit choppy, I wrote this several times, but for some reason, it did not want to come out right ;))

Our 2011 Christmas Letter

This year, I was put in charge of composing our annual Christmas Letter. I decided to post a copy, so here you go...

Enjoy ;)

Greetings to all from Cameron, North Carolina! 2011 has been a rather busy year in the Breagy home, so I (Grace) will do my best to recall some major events.

I celebrated my 15th birthday in January, and received my learners permit- which I have positively enjoyed, since I love driving. I keep busy with my goats, now numbering eight- there is always something going on with them (For example, did you know that you give Pepto-Bismal to a goat that ate dog food? I learned that...). I have also taken up harp again, and am very much enjoying myself. January also marked another event- the birth of my youngest sister, Miss Abigail Constance, whom we affectionately call Miss B. She is the first child to be a mama’s girl, and is typically a very sociable baby. As such, Abigail loves walking through the store waving and shouting “Hi” to all. Taking her first steps at 9 months, Abigail is our earliest walker yet and is constantly exploring everything. She also has her Dad and Bubba (Stephen) wrapped around her little finger.

We also decided upon a name for our farm- Plain Truth Hill, from John Bunyan’s “Holy War”. We quickly learned that we should have gone with our gut instinct, which was Pandemonium Plantation, because that’s really what we are. We have had many interesting episodes, ranging from having a goat in the kitchen to a chicken in the car to lighting a fire which ended up slightly out of control... well, only enough to have to call 911 ;), and we are now quite convinced that nothing is “normal” in our house. But that’s what keeps us on our toes, right? We keep the true farmers at our church rolling with our escapades.

In February, Dad, Stephen and I drove up to NH for our great-grandmother Breagy’s funeral. Though saddened because of Nana’s death, we really enjoyed our visit with some other relatives that we don’t get to see very often.

March was Samuel’s 5th birthday. He is growing up so quickly, but has still kept his full head of hair. Quite the gentleman, Sam is always quick to let the ladies go first and eagerly holds the door open for all. He is full of smiles, even when he is not feeling well; and brings joy to everyone around him. We also began to milk our goats in mid-March.

Claire-bear turned 8 in April, and has now expressed an interest in learning the harp. She has just discovered knitting and crocheting and thoroughly enjoys both. She adores anything small, and loves giving to others. Candy is one of her weaknesses, but she also has a penchant for handing it out to all of her friends.

Twenty joyous years of marriage have gone by quickly for my parents, who celebrated their anniversary in May. Dad planned a surprise trip for Mom to the Biltmore in Asheville, NC, but clued me in on it so that I could help him plan. They went away for three days while the children stayed at home with a good friend.

In June, Stephen and I went up to visit some friends in VA to go with them to our (mine and Stephen’s) first goat show. We did not bring any of our goats, but Stephen was given the privilege of showing someone else’s goat, while I was the photographer for the event.

July was Philip’s 3rd birthday and Robin Shea’s 10th. Pip is all boy; he loves being outdoors and will often disappear to go out when we are not looking. He has given us quite a few scares, but now we know right where to look for him. He is very sweet to the ladies, but sometimes gets a little carried away with them, and has actually tackled one of his little lady friends before.

Robin Shea still loves purple and is rather upset that all of my hand-me-downs are pink (My favorite color at her age). She is very kind and absolutely adores Miss B, constantly taking care of her. Her highly developed sense of justice keeps us all straight; you will be in big trouble if you snitch food. She is also the odd-ball in some respects- she doesn’t like farm work (though she will do it), would rather live in the city and doesn’t like sweet tea or hot chocolate.

We also celebrated the two-year anniversary of our church plant here in NC. God has blessed us tremendously and the church has slowly and steadily grown.

In August, Dad and Stephen helped raise a pole-barn. This was their first time doing this, but it is the kind of hands-on work that they both enjoy, and they learned lots from this experience.

In September, our family went on a Civil War Tour, put on by some good friends of ours. It rained almost the entire tour, but we still had loads of fun. We visited many places, including Harper’s Ferry, Antietum, Arlington Cemetery and many other places. I was able to be on the lunch crew for the trip, which I greatly enjoyed, even though it required getting up early, which I don’t enjoy.

October was packed with events as well- first was Dad’s birthday. Dad continues to really love being the teaching elder at our church, Moore Christian Assembly. And no, we are not saying that we are more christian than you; we just have church in Moore County. He continues to floor me with his God-given ability to meet new people everywhere, something that I am trying to master. He enjoys working from home, as he can spend more time with the family.

We celebrated Stephen’s 14th birthday as well- he is growing into quite the young man. He has recently started apprenticing with a film editor, and has taken many filming trips with the Horn family, as they are filming for a history home-school curriculum. Stephen has developed a taste for web-designing, and is considering taking it up more seriously. His passion is Apple everything. He continues to take care of his 60+ chickens, and can not wait until next summer when I will drive him once a week to apprentice with one of our friends, who is a general handy-man.

Next in October came the Marriage Conference, which Dad was speaking at. Stephen and I went with him, taking two of our friends as well. We all had a great time- our entire family loves conferences; we enjoy getting to meet new people and listening to all of the different speakers.

In November, we went up to NY for our great-grandmother Faranda’s birthday party. We all had a really good time, almost the whole of G. G.’s grandchildren and great-grandchildren were there. It was great becoming re-acquainted with all of our cousins and other relatives.

And now, we come to December... Dad and Stephen went to a week-long conference, where Dad spoke and Stephen ran the audio. There were not many children at the conference, so Stephen actually had to *gasp* talk to adults, which just goes to prove that we are un-socialized homeschoolers... Oh wait, I’m supposed to be working on the whole sarcasm thing; oops... Also, Sam and Miss B contracted the chicken pox last week, though they both have a very mild case. We are still waiting to see if anyone else will get them on the second round.

We will also celebrate Mom’s birthday in a few days. Mom has been keeping busy around the house- having seven children and living at Pandemonium Plantation- what do you expect? She also loves to be a blessing to others; her servant’s heart is very humbling for me to see. I love her go-with-the-flow attitude; she is willing to drop what she is doing to help anyone who needs her; be it one of her children, someone from church or anyone else. I love her to pieces :)

Thank you all for sitting through my first attempt at writing our annual Christmas letter. Stay tuned on our family blog at breagybunch.blogspot.com to hear of some of our adventures. I assure you, you will be very amused. We wish you all a very Merry Christmas and Joyous 2012. Until we meet again, may God hold you in His hand.

Love,

The Breagy Bunch

Steve and Kristina

Grace (15), Stephen (14), Robin Shea (10), Claire (8), Samuel (5), Philip (3) and Abigail (11 mos.)

Coming soon...

Coming soon...

A review of:

It's (not that) Complicated: How to relate to guys in a Healthy, Sane and Biblical Way

Authors: Anna Sophia & Elizabeth Botkin

Book Review: Relationships: a mess worth making

Relationships: a mess worth making

In Relationships: a mess worth making, Timothy Lane and Paul Tripp explore the many dynamics of relationships and delve into many of the problems that we experience in those relationships.

One of the recurring themes was that we are sinners and the people that we cultivate relationships with are sinners as well. This fact will either cause us to throw up our hands in exasperation and exclaim "Well! Then what's the point?", or it will cause us to re-enter these relationships with renewed vigor, knowing that, with Gods help, and a strong relationship with Him, we will acquire better relationships down here on earth. Another theme was that all of the things that we need to bestow on others (mercy, forgiveness, love, patience, etc.) are things that Christ has bestowed on us; so we would be amiss to not give the same to others.

I enjoyed the practicality of this book; there was much advice given by the authors for everyday use. I also appreciated the fact that the authors were very humble; they never pointed the finger to say "This is for you, we have it down-pat!"

Overall, I loved the book and would recommend it to anyone who is looking to have enduring, Christ-built relationships. For the rest of you (the ones that are not looking to improve their relationships), the only thing I can do for you is to pray for you, that God would change your heart and give you the desire to build better relationships.

WARNING!! The authors are correct: this is very messy! Do not undertake this task unless you are willing to open yourself up and make a mess; believe me, I know from personal experience. :) But it is definitely "a mess worth making".

The purpose of this blog

I have created this blog because I think that it is very important to, as 2 Corinthians 10:5 says "[bring] every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ". This means that everything that we do must be with a purpose. Not just "for the fun of it". I really like what Jonathan Edwards said in his 5th resolution- "Resolved, never to lose one moment of time; but improve it the most profitable way I possibly can." Now, Jonathan Edwards has a really good grasp on what it means to manage your time well. It is crucial to maximize every second of every day; do not waste a moment. This is not something that we do easily; we like to do things because "we want to", but often don't give a thought as to what God wants us to do with this time that He (big emphasis on the word "He") gave us. Here I will be posting book reviews- because reading good books is part of "redeeming the time". We can't just read what we want; we have to think "Is this bringing God glory? Or is it for my own pleasure?" With that being said, I will only post here about once or twice a month, mainly because I only read about a book a month :)

I hope that this blog blesses you in your quest to better serve your King, and redeem the time for His glory.